Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Spleen damage

We have a term in our house "spleen damage," which refers to anything even remotely suggesting to our kids that their parents might have a sex life... "ewwwww, gross you guys!"

When my son was younger he took a fall and had to have a CAT scan to check for spleen damage (he was fine) and I guess it was the first time he'd ever heard of a spleen, and had no clue what it was or did, but it seemed to fascinate him, and ever since then whenever they would catch us kissing or making cute little comments to each other he would yell out, "my spleen!"

Of course, now my hubby and I exploit this to the fullest - I'll buy the hubby a birthday card, or stick one in his pack if he's going off somewhere... and I often buy the "suggestive" ones... and once one of the kids picked it up and read it - something about sex on the kitchen floor I think - and now they are very careful about reading cards that aren't intended for them.... "Is this a spleen card?" I save the hubby the green M&M's, and when D#2 asked why, I told her.... "ewww Mom, that's gross - you think your funny, but you're not... that's just gross." I'm always telling them... don't ask questions you don't really want the answers to! Spleen damage - I love to see them squirm. I always tell them, it could be worse, you could have parents who can't stand each other, instead of parents who, well, you get the picture.

My talking about being a "sexy knitter" would be enough to cause spleen damage. So, of course, I do mention it from time to time. Sexy and parents do not go together - spleen damage.

So, check out the progress on my Essential Stripe Wendy/Heather Tub sweater... it's getting there! I know, I'm slow, but I'm knitting as fast as I can. I actually took a picture of it on me this morning, and it's fitting beautifully. I can't wait for it to be done. I'm hoping it will be ready for Thanksgiving, since it will be cold where we're going and it would be perfect.

I actually posted the picture of me in the sweater - for about a minute, until I (thankfully) took a closer look at the picture. The sweater doesn't quite cover my belly and there was about 2" of "muffin top" action goin' on. My stomach is not up for showing to the public any more - and I didn't want to cause any of you spleen damage.

18 Comments:

At 9:35 AM, Anonymous heather said...

That's a good one! Spleen damage.
Lizzie's still too young to be grossed out by the husband and I, so whenever we're caught hugging or smooching, she wants to join in.
Your sweater is looking fabulous, and everytime I see it, it makes me feel the need to make one. Guess I better get to it, eh?

 
At 9:41 AM, Blogger Jen said...

I love spleen damage... I have to admit, I've never actually seen my parents touch each other, so I'd probably suffer from spleen damage if I ever witnessed it.

Essential stripe looks lovely, if I hadn't mentioned it already. I'd been meaning to for a while, but just haven't had time to actually leave comments. I love that you used a slightly variegated yarn for one of your stripe colors.

Look forward to meeting you on Saturday.

 
At 3:20 PM, Anonymous Jeanie said...

Oh my gosh Lynda -- this sounds JUST like my (15 year old) daughter! She's REPULSED by the thought that HWWL and I could even consider doing "that"! PLUS, I ordered a Sexy Knitters Club t-shirt and when she saw it, she flat out forbade me to wear it. Uh, excuse me... just WHO is the parent here again???

 
At 3:40 PM, Blogger candsmom said...

Your spleen damage post cracked me up!! When I was younger, I was convinced that my parents had sex only 4 times in their lives- to conceive the 4 of us, of course! One night when I was 19, I woke up to use the bathroom and saw their bedroom door closed...which it NEVER was. A couple of minutes later I heard the shower running and some giggling. MAJOR spleen damage. I needed a splenectomy after that one. ;-) You're making awesome progress on your sweater! It looks beautiful. Keep up the good work grossin' out your kids! ;-)

 
At 4:21 PM, Blogger Sheryl said...

I am on the child end of those sex subjects. My mom is 70 and seems to have lost all sense of propriety and is striking up conversations about aspects of sexuality...even at 47 it is spleen damage!

Your tub sweater looks great - I am a purple person, so I love the colors.

 
At 5:12 PM, Blogger Sonya said...

I can't believe I'm about to admit this, but I walked in on my parents doing it when I was about 11 or 12. It makes me want to poke my eyes out even now. Talk about spleen damage!

I love the colors on the essential stripe. It's going to be gorgeous.

 
At 5:14 PM, Blogger LC in Sunny So Cal said...

My spleen thanks you for editing your photo choices. But tell...how does the rest of it fit and look? Are you going to like it? I love the colors. Aren't you glad our parents weren't like we are? :)

 
At 6:04 PM, Blogger keohinani said...

omg, whatever! you knit at a great pace! jeez, it would take me weeks to get to where you are with the one or two hour (if i'm lucky) pockets of time i get every night. i love it! i think your sweater looks great!
your post reminds me of the story my parents tell me & my older brother about when my little brother was conceived. they used to buy chocolate covered donuts and sit us down in front of the television with sesame street & mr. rogers. they told us "mommy and daddy are going to go in the room and talk story." hah! next thing you know, mommy's pregnant?! so whenever we heard the phrase "talk story," we assumed the mommy was going to have a baby.

 
At 7:00 PM, Blogger Lynda said...

Ew, Ew, Ew - Cottage- talk about spleen damage.... ew...

And, Keohinani - too funny! - and we're guilty of the video thing.... but now their old enough, they just don't fall for that anymore!

 
At 7:19 PM, Blogger amylovie said...

Your kids are a hoot. My girls get jealous when my hubby and I smooch. They try to split us up.

Your sweater is coming along beautifully. Don't be afraid to show a little belly. Probably all of us "sexy" knitters have one. Being a curvy woman, in my opionion, is sexy.

Amy

 
At 10:17 PM, Blogger Wendy said...

Ok. Four words: I have spleen damage.

 
At 10:29 PM, Blogger Isela said...

That is just super duper hilarious...spleen damage! LOL.

Back when I was young and innocent (LOL), I walked into my room that I happened to share with one of my aunts, well, her and her boyfriend gave me some terrible spleen damage that day--talk about an eye opener, LOL.

The stripes are looking superb!

 
At 11:03 AM, Blogger Katie said...

Aren't family jokes the best? You and your kids will be laughing over that for years to come.

The sweater looks great--I love the purple.

 
At 7:00 AM, Blogger Donna Boucher said...

You crack me up!

Your poor kids :o)

 
At 4:50 PM, Anonymous Maggie said...

That is so cute Lynda!! Your Essential Stripe Wendy/Heather Tub sweater is looking fab!! I'm with you...no tummy photos for me anymore either...LOL!

 
At 6:46 AM, Blogger Sheryl said...

Hey Lynda, checking back in...how was the party? Thanks for the encouragement about Yarntopia, we are excited and exhausted and this is only the beginning.

 
At 2:15 PM, Blogger Gina said...

The "muffin top action" quote has me giggling up a storm. Thank you, I needed a bit of cheer today.

 
At 9:34 AM, Blogger Wanda said...

I love that you call it spleen damage! So cute. The Essential Stripe Sweater is looking great too. Can't wait to see it finished.

 

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